Things that went up yesterday

More things went up yesterday than Rush’s Viagra powered crank.

The shuttle finally lifted off as the nation held its breath. Looks like the duct tape and spit held the thing together. If there is a goddess of space flights the shuttle will stay intact until it returns safely to earth.

The funky looking guy with the Chia Pet hair, who is the head of North Korea, fired off six missiles which apparently pretty much fizzled. Not sure what his plan is but if this was his best shot he probably needs to head back to the planning table and drawing board. Sadly the bush administration has been too hardheaded to continue President Clinton’s successful mission of keeping the guy content and busy doing other things rather than building new missiles. Imagine that! A Clinton plan that worked trashed by an unsuccessful bush plan.

Finally yesterday the climax came. A nation full of junk food and alcohol played with explosives. All over our country beautiful exploding things rose up into the night sky and people cheered.

It was, as Cartman would say, a hella-Fourth.